2688 Shared Wounds (Part 2) "What about Rena's triplets?" Orion asked. "They were born at the end of your military tour and they are barely two years old now." "I might have skipped town on purpose a few times and dropped the little stinky bombs on Nalrond whenever I could." Lith turned around to pretend to check the tables and actually hid his face. "They weren't mine and my free time is precious." "Dirty bastard." Orion laughed while Raaz sent a reproachful gaze to them both. "Well, I'm just like you two. I haven't dealt with a newborn ever since... you know. I'm rusty as well. Mind if I join your little club from time to time?" "No problem." Lith nodded. A gala required making sure that there would be enough space, seats, and food for everyone. The furniture had to be different from that of everyday life. More luxurious to impress the highest nobles and more discreet because it would stay at the edge of the rooms instead of the center. The furniture had to be easy on the eyes but not so much that it would steal attention from the main event taking place in the hall. Like magic, cooking, and most things in life, it was a matter of balance. A long, eerie silence befell the corpse of the conversation and like a true healer, Raaz resuscitated it. "By the way, Lith, I told Orion about the struggles you are having with your violet core. I hope you don't mind." "No, Dad. Quite the contrary." Lith shook his head. "Orion here is a friend and knows about Awakening. At this point, I could use some advice. Any advice. Heck, even platitudes will do." "Man, you Awakened sure have it hard." Orion did feel Lith's pain since he had a similar issue that prevented him from Awakening. "The only thing I had to do to get mine was grow up. You, instead, need some kind of enlightenment, correct?" "More or less." Lith nodded. "As you know, my life force is split. The problem is that my mind is in the same condition and I can't fix one without fixing the other first. Suggestions?" "Have you tried, meditation, talking therapy, or just sitting in front of a mirror and telling yourself what you know is wrong with you how to fix it?" Orion talked from experience, having done all of the above to work on his grief. "Yes. I spoke with my Awakened, undead, and even my Abomination friends. I meditated and I went to a gods damned Fringe. I tried immersing myself in nature, work, and even did voluntary work. Nothing helped." Lith sighed. With time, Demon Grasp was becoming less and less effective. Lith was close to manifesting enough vortexes that once Awakened would bring his violet core to the next level. The problem was that his body resisted the change. Using his breathing technique was becoming increasingly difficult and painful, forcing him to take long breaks to make sure his mana core wouldn't break. Lith had even tried following Solus' example and having his own support group with Nandi, Bytra, and Theseus. Lith suffered from split life forces and the Eldritch hybrids suffered from nigh-split personality. They all had to come to terms with their respective past and actions. The main difference was that Lith's condition made it impossible for him to make progress whereas the Abominations experienced fits of blind rage called blood madness. It was caused by the pure mind of the Abomination's clone being tainted by the memories of the atrocities committed by their originals. Raaz was the one who had that idea as well since he, Quylla, and Solus were benefitting from their support group. Things had gone smoothly for Lith at first, but it had taken him a short while to realize there was actually little common ground to work with. Bytra and the others were ultimately innocents. They weren't the ones who had made those decisions millennia ago nor did they commit any crime. Their burden came from dealing with the price that the original Abominations had paid to gain the power and knowledge that their clones now wielded. Lith, instead, was his own man and the source of his own problems. Ever since his days on Earth, Lith/Derek had learned how to channel his hatred and rage to face the adversities head-on. That same hatred had followed him on Mogar, pushing him to keep breathing, fighting, and working on whatever he needed to better his life. His love for Carl first and Tista later had given him purpose and direction, but it had always been hatred that had fueled his ambition. The important people in his life gave him the strength to resist the pull of his rage, to not let the hate poison his very being. Yet it was just palliative care. Lith had no idea how to temper those feelings, let alone how to live without them. Without his rage, he was empty. Without hate, there was just a dead man wearing a dead child's skin. Those weren't mere emotions anymore, they were an integral part of his identity. "Then I am out of ideas, sorry." Orion shrugged, using small spheres of light to point where new chandeliers would be needed to light the room evenly during the ball. "For what it's worth, those things didn't work for me either." Lith nodded and the three men started working again. Silence filled the room again but this time Raaz didn't need to step in. Orion clenched his hand and spoke first. "My Little One told me that War was shattered inside the Fringe. It must have hurt. War was the first of the War series and one of my best pieces." "You have no idea." Lith stopped what he was doing and turned around to look Orion in the eyes. "But it was worth it. No one died. This time." "No, you misunderstood me." Orion scratched his head in embarrassment. "I wasn't blaming you for breaking the sword. I was offering you to make a new one. It's sort of our tradition. First the Gatekeeper, then Ruin, and finally War. "I was expecting you to contact me for a replacement for a while already. If it turns out you changed your peerless weaponsmith for the workings of a Lizard, I'll be offended. Even if it's a real Dragon." Orion laughed to make it clear that he was just joking. "Didn't Quylla..." Only then did Lith realize that aside from Solus, Salaark, and Kamila, no one had actually seen Ragnar??k, Salaark had cut off that part from her mind link with the rest of the friends and family to keep her Creation Magic lesson a secret. They knew the angry blade by name, but that was it. Lith hadn't fought once after leaving the Fringe and he kept the blade stored to avoid someone touching it accidentally. Kamila was the exception because Lith hid nothing from her and he had felt the need to introduce her to the reborn member of the family. "I'm sorry, I should have told you right when it happened. Lith clapped his hands, prompting the house staff to leave the room as fast as they could.