Chapter 4102: Enemy Within (Part 1) Filia and Frey shapeshifted their clothes to clean them from the snow and hugged the Professor, who felt both proud and flattered. Proud because his magicless children had triumphed against the Verhens and Fastarrows with alchemical tools. Flattered because he hadn’t done much. As a Highmaster, Vastor knew everything about building a fort and bringing it down. He had taught Filia and Frey just the basics for their winter games. He had no idea it would be so effective. Vastor had failed to consider that Lith knew little about engineering and Protector knew nothing at all. Their little ones just piled up snow and gave it shape with water magic, whereas Filia and Frey built load-bearing pillars and walls. While the other forts often collapsed under their own weight, it took quite the snowballpower to put a dent in the Vastors’ castle. "I stand corrected." Zinya said while serving everyone hot chocolate and biscuits. "When we can have you all to ourselves." "Glad I contributed to your victory, but I have to ask. Tezka, you didn’t cheat to help them, right?" Vastor returned the hug and stared at the blue and red wolves that followed the children. "Please." The Suneater scoffed. "I never meddle in pups’ fights. We beasts had our own battle, and I won with a mere gaze." "Really?" Zinya chuckled. "Yes." Frey took a sip of his hot chocolate. "The other Emperor Beasts all flopped on their bellies and surrendered." "Yeah, but that doesn’t count." Filia bit a cookie. "They started over after Uncle Tezka sealed his powers." "And?" Zinya asked, while caressing her children’s heads. "I won again, but it took me about five minutes." Tezka said. "Five minutes." The Master echoed in disbelief. "Were the other Emperor Beasts that good?" "No. They joined forces and attacked me together." The Fylgja sighed. "With only two bodies and only first magic, it took me a while to turn the tables and win." "You defeated them all by yourself?" Zinya asked. "Didn’t they get angry?" "Not at all. They called it the best training ever and crowned the second place as the victor, saying that I’m invincible and can’t be counted as a contestant." Tezka didn’t bother hide his bragging behind false modesty. The kids cheered and hugged their Tezka, feeding him biscuits. Seeing his family so happy only made Vastor feel worse. The venomous worm of envy in his chest was nothing compared to the bitter snake of helplessness that ravaged his heart. Over the years, the Master had changed as much as his Eldritches. He still cared about his mission, but a vague concept like "the greater good of humanity" paled in comparison with the feelings he had developed for the members of his new family. Vastor knew how much Zinya suffered from her inability to give him a child. She never mentioned it anymore and did her best to appear cheerful, but he could see her shoulders slouch and her eyes dim whenever she thought he wasn’t looking. Too many times had he overheard the children asking Zinya why everyone was getting a new sibling, and they didn’t. When that happened, Zinya always blamed her age and told Filia and Frey that some things were beyond even a skilled Healer like the Master. Then, she would find an isolated place to cry as soon as the children went back to their room. Every tear she shed hurt Vastor more than his envy ever could. He had grown so frustrated with himself that he resented his own research. ’It’s all my fault if I can’t give Zin a child.’ He thought while everyone in the room smiled and laughed. ’It’s because of my arrogance that I’m now sterile. It’s because of my repeated failures that Zin might never experience motherhood again. 𝓯𝓻𝒆𝙚𝒘𝓮𝙗𝓷𝒐𝓿𝙚𝒍.𝙘𝓸𝙢 ’It’s because of my recklessness that the fortune I’ve built will end up in my brother’s hands, and Zinya and the kids will be kicked out of this house upon my death. If only I reached the Indech’s level, everyone would be happy. ’Zin would have a baby, Filia and Frey could live here for as long as they want, and my bloodline wouldn’t be entrusted to those two useless morons of Quifar and Zesor, dammit! I’ve lived all my life as a failure, and it seems I’ll die as one too.’ The envy of the Master hurt, but it was his heart as a father and a husband that bled the most. Lith may indeed fulfill Vastor’s life project, but that would change nothing for Zinya, Filia, and Frey. ’I will let her down, just like I did everyone else.’ Vastor sighed. ’And that’s still not the worst-case scenario. If my identity as the Master is exposed, Zinya and the children will be lucky to get out with their heads on their necks. ’They’ll lose everything and curse the day we met.’ Later that night, Vastor had yet to make up his mind, but he stood on the precipice of a decision from which there was no turning back, and whose consequences not even Tezka could predict. "Is everything alright?" Zinya asked once they were in the privacy of their bedroom. "You have been in a weird mood all day." "I..." Vastor looked at her and then at himself. He still couldn’t believe that a woman so beautiful and kind had chosen to be with a monster like him. Zogar Vastor was a monster even to himself, but not for what he looked like, only for what he did in the secrecy of his lab. ’Because you never told her the truth.’ A cruel voice inside of him said. ’Zinya loves you only because you hid your hideous heart from her. If she knew you are uglier on the inside than you are on the outside, she would have never proposed to you.’ "I need to ask you a question." Vastor shuddered, trying to silence the voice. "Do you still want me to Awaken you?" "Are you serious?" Zinya’s face lit up with joy. Then, before he could take those words back, she rushed to say: "Yes. Absolutely yes." "I see." Vastor raised his hand to keep her away, and she froze in place, her arms still extended to embrace him. "I’m considering it, but there are a few things we need to discuss. First, you have to think about what to tell the children. "If you Awaken, there will be no more excuse not to let them." He said, and she nodded for him to continue. "Then, there is a serious issue I need you to consider. Becoming an Awakened will make you stronger, and that’s dangerous." "If you refer to breakthroughs and training, I already know everything from Kami. I’ll follow any training regime you want and study magic diligently." Zinya said. "That’s not what I’m talking about." He raised his head to look her straight in the eyes. "You might become strong enough to get pregnant, but not enough to balance my Abomination half. "If that were to happen, the baby would kill you unless I kill him first." At those words, Zinya went pale, and every trace of joy disappeared from her face. "I don’t want to make that choice. I don’t want you to have to make that choice."