Chapter 171: Chapter 1 The conversation with her half-sister pushed Maxi’s already-addled mind into turmoil, and she began to question her feelings. In retrospect, everything was subject to doubt. Why had she been so obsessed with Riftan? What had made her so irrational? In a little over a year, he had shaken her life to the core, made her want to live, and then sucked all the vitality from her. He had become her reason to live. But was that normal? It was possible that she had blindly followed him like a newborn duckling would its mother. The moment uncertainty gripped her, even the things she had thought clear became muddled, and she found it impossible to unravel the tangled strings of her heart. Having returned to where she had started, she looked back at everything – her memories in Anatol, the campaign, her ordeals in the war – and questioned whether they were real or a distortion of the mind. The doubt that had taken root in the pit of her stomach grew by the day until it threatened to come bursting out of her throat. “My lady, why don’t you take a short stroll? There is no wind today, and it’s sunny in the garden.” Maxi raised her head. She had been immersed in her thoughts when her nursemaid made the suggestion. Joana drew the thick curtain, letting in harsh silver sunlight. It was that single hour of the morning when her room received sun. After briefly gazing out at the dazzling autumn day, Maxi listlessly turned away from the window. “I... d-don’t feel like going out.” “Do you know how pallid you look, my lady? You’ll end up like a corpse if you don’t get some sun. Please, enjoy some fresh air on days like this. Waste away any longer and your husband won’t take you with him when he comes.” Her nursemaid’s last point finally roused Maxi out of bed. Even though she was uncertain of her feelings, Riftan was still the motivation behind all of her actions. Maxi had lost weight over the past few weeks, and she draped a robe over her now too-big dress. Joana helped her out of her chambers. The annex was deathly silent. The vast, opulent building was devoid of people except for a handful of maidservants and guards the duke had posted to keep an eye on Maxi, but even they were hard to come by unless she deliberately sought them out. The servants called this place the house of exile. For years, the duke had confined the Croyso women he deemed incompetent to this residence to keep them out of his sight. Maxi descended the chilly stairway and stepped out into the courtyard clogged with fallen leaves. The red ivy twined along the walls glistened white in the sun, and the evergreen bushes rustled in the breeze. Walking along the flowerbed, Maxi vacantly gazed down at the dried-up vegetation. A few birds hopped through it, hopefully pecking at imaginary seeds. Her idle observation was interrupted when she noticed soldiers bustling about the path leading up to the main castle. It was a baffling sight. Not even a single ant approached the annex around this time. Maxi was wondering if something had happened when one of the guards spotted her and strode over. “You cannot be outside, my lady. The duke commanded that you were to remain in the annex.” Maxi’s face flushed at the guard’s prison warden-like attitude. Though they had made it clear that she was prohibited from entering the main castle, had they not allowed her to take strolls in the garden or visit the library until now? She was rooted to the spot, flustered, when the guard said authoritatively, “Why aren’t you returning to your chambers?” Joana had been uneasily standing at the back until then. At the guard’s tone, she swiftly grabbed Maxi’s elbow. “I will escort her ladyship back to her chambers.” Like a helpless chick in her nursemaid’s arms, Maxi numbly returned to her room. Joana was beside herself, mumbling that she should never have made such a suggestion. “How strange. His Grace was never against you taking walks in the garden before...” Closing the door to Maxi’s chambers, Joana studied her charge’s face. “In any case, at least he has been sending healers to you regularly. I’m sure he is not completely devoid of affection for you. You mustn’t let this upset you too much.” Maxi could not even bring herself to scoff at the absurd attempt at consolation. The only reason her father sent healers was that his plans would go awry if she were to die before Rosetta’s wedding. Rosetta’s mother had passed in her sickbed before she could bear a son. If Maxi were to meet the same fate, Rosetta’s marriage to the royal family would fall apart no matter the size of her dowry. Instead of explaining all this to her nursemaid, Maxi gave a half-hearted nod and removed her robe. She handed it to Joana, who folded it and draped it over her forearm. Something fell out of the robe and landed on the floor with a clink as she did so. “Oh dear, what’s this?” Joana picked up the object. Unconcerned, Maxi turned slowly to see what it was. Her eyes grew wide as soon as they locked on the blackened, dented coin. She had kept it in a secret pocket she had sewn inside the robe to ensure she would never lose it again. Maxi hastily held out her hand. “G-Give it to me.” For a moment, Joana blinked and glanced back and forth between the nail-sized coin and Maxi’s face. She then clicked her tongue in bemusement and handed it back to Maxi. “You did have a habit of collecting pebbles or weeds ever since you were a child. You used to say you would make a crown. But you are a grown woman now, much too old to be collecting junk like this.” “Th-This is not... j-junk.” “Of course you would say that.” Shaking her head, Joana left the room. Maxi stared down at the coin. This was irrefutable proof that everything she had felt and experienced after Riftan came into her life was real. Brushing her fingers over the rough surface, she silently mouthed, I pray that nothing bad will happen to you... and that only good things will come to you. Her heart wrenched as she repeated Riftan’s words from when he had given her the coin. Her face crumpled as she pressed it to her lips, and her shoulders shook with the fresh realization of her weakness. Rosetta had been right. She trusted no one, not even herself. The only thing she was certain of was her ill-fated future. “M-My lady!” Maxi hastily wiped at her tears when she heard Joana’s call. The nursemaid came rushing into the room and pointed out the window. “We have a problem!” Joana cried. “I tried to find out why the guard treated you that way – it’s because the Remdragon Knights are here!” Maxi stared back at Joana, the words not sinking in right away. Clearly terrified of something, her nursemaid drew the curtains and dragged Maxi over to sit on the bed. “It seems your husband had sent a request to the duke asking to see you. I’m told that our knights had a difficult time driving him away.” “Th-They drove him away?” Maxi parroted back. “You mean... R-Riftan came to see me... but Father... s-sent him away?” “Of course. What choice did he have when your husband might have been here to demand a divorce?” Joana ran her eyes over Maxi’s ashen face and heaved a sigh. “What man would be happy to see his wife in such a condition? His Grace probably had no choice but to turn him away.” Maxi anxiously glanced around. Had Riftan truly come to seek a divorce? Her nursemaid seemed to believe so. Perhaps everyone at Croyso Castle did so too. Joana flicked a glance at the door as though Riftan might come bursting in at any moment, then squeezed Maxi’s hands. “Thankfully, it will be Paxias soon. When the weather grows colder, even your husband will be forced to return to his estate in the country, and he won’t be able to leave until the following year. Just hold out till then. Your sister will be married, and your father might be more lenient with you.” Joana patted Maxi on the arm as though she were reassuring a child, then left the room once more. Unclenching her fist, Maxi stared at the coin that now glistened with cold sweat. Knowing that Riftan was here made her heart flutter. Maxi bit her lip. Had she not followed her father here because she had been too scared to face Riftan? Even so, she was overcome with the desire to see him. Shoving the coin into her pocket, Maxi peeked through the drawn curtains. She might be able to see him at a distance if she went somewhere higher. After a moment of hesitation, she clenched her jaw and pulled on her robe once more. She wanted to confirm with her own eyes that Riftan had returned unharmed. Maxi surveyed the corridor for a long time through a gap in the door. When she was certain that no one was around, she quietly slipped out of her room. No one must have suspected that she would sneak out, as the back door the servants used to visit the latrine was unguarded. Maxi quickened her pace. She stepped outside into a forest of auburn hazel trees. Concealing herself behind the trunks, Maxi circled the annex toward the main castle. The long period of bed rest had left her weak, and the brief sprint through the forest was enough to send her head reeling and legs shaking. After catching her breath behind the bushes, she sneaked into the castle. ... As luck would have it, no one spotted her. Maxi’s eyes darted around as she leaped up the steps of the narrow staircase two at a time. She felt faint by the time she reached the fifth floor. Panting like a dog in the scorching sun, Maxi barely managed to make it up one more flight. The sixth-floor landing opened onto a wide, arched terrace overlooking the entire estate. Maxi teetered over to the battlement and saw the House of Croyso banner flying atop the roof of the castle’s tower. Beyond the thick castle walls, the Remdragon Knights were camped in front of the gates. Even though they were too far away for Maxi to make out their faces, she spotted Riftan right away. He sat on his horse, Talon. As she watched the wind tousle his black hair, she thought her heart might burst from her chest. All of the complicated emotions raging inside her instantly melded into one – the desire to see him up close. Even if he no longer wanted her, she thought she could endure it if she could just have his arms around her one last time. The irresistible urge took over, and Maxi spun on her heels. She was about to race down the stairs when someone grabbed her arm. Maxi shrieked. One of her father’s personal, knighted guards looked down at her with a frightening expression. “The duke wishes you to remain in your chambers. Did no one convey that to you?” “P-Please unhand me.” Ignoring her request, the knight briskly led her down the stairs. “His Grace was furious when he found out that you were not in your room,” he said irritably as he dragged her along. Maxi gasped in terror when the knight turned down the corridor on the fourth floor. Her whole body shook with fear. “I-I... only w-wanted to see him from afar! I-I will return to my ch-chambers now! Please... t-turn a blind eye just this once.” ... “The duke commanded that you be brought here. I am bound to obey his orders,” the knight said apathetically as he kept up his brisk pace. Maxi struggled to free her arm from his grasp, but it was simply impossible to fight back against the strength of a seasoned knight. Before she knew it, he was dragging her into the room at the end of the corridor. Terrified, Maxi whirled left and right. Her stomach turned as she took in the mirror, the chair, and the array of riding crops on the wall. She clung to the knight’s arm, stopping him from leaving. “I promise... to never leave the annex again! I-I swear! P-Please let me out.” The knight sighed and gently pried her hands off. “You should not have disobeyed your father’s orders from the start. Why would you do such a thing knowing full well how strict His Grace is?” The knight turned around apathetically and left the room. When she heard the lock turn, overwhelming fear sent her into a frantic attempt to open it. No matter how hard she rattled the door, it refused to budge. Her legs began to tremble. With a look of sheer terror, Maxi sagged to the floor. Her reflection in the mirror seemed to jeer at her, asking if she really had not suspected that this would happen. What had driven her to willingly return to this hell? Was being discarded by Riftan such a terrifying fate? Had she truly believed that he was worse than her father? Maxi hugged her knees. Even if that were the case, she should have run away to somewhere else entirely instead of coming back. How was she any different from livestock that meekly followed the rope to the slaughterhouse? Filled with self-hatred, violent sobs shook her whole body. She had no idea how long she spent crying, but the sky began to take on a tinge of pale purple when the duke entered the room. Maxi recoiled and rose to her feet. Her father strode to the middle of the room and haughtily raised his chin. “I’ve been too lenient with you,” he said in a voice that sent a chill down her spine. “I only requested one thing – that you remain as inconspicuous as a ghost. Was that such a difficult task?” “I-I was... just trying to s-see him from afar. I wasn’t trying to defy-” “When did I give you permission to speak?” The duke struck the floor with his cane, and Maxi promptly closed her mouth. Glaring at her, the duke muttered menacingly, “That low-born has undone twenty years of efforts in educating you.” Clutching his cane with both hands, the duke gritted his teeth. “I suppose it is to be expected. The company of an ignorant commoner who knows nothing of the social order is bound to be a corrupt influence.” Maxi had been staring at the floor up until then, her face ashen. She jerked her head up in anger at her father’s words. How could he speak so badly of Riftan? “Riftan... f-fought in a dangerous campaign in your stead, a-and suffered all the hardships that entailed. You of all people... shouldn’t s-speak of him so-” The cane struck her before she could finish. Maxi saw stars as she collapsed onto the floor. The sharp blow was so painful that she could not even scream. Her head pulsed as though her skull were cracked open, and her temples burned as if on fire. The room was spinning. Clutching her head, Maxi peered up at the duke in terror. The duke’s chest heaved as he spat, “You dare speak to me in such a manner?” As if the first blow had not been enough to appease him, the duke swung his cane again and struck her shoulder. The bone-splicing pain made Maxi twist away, struggling for breath. In just two blows, the Duke of Croyso had managed to crush all her defiance. Her whole body shook as she tried to steady herself with both palms on the floor. The duke grabbed her by the hair and yanked her head up. “State your complaints clearly. Stop stammering like a fool. Speak so I can understand!” Maxi’s lips trembled. Clutching her chin, he savagely urged her on. “Come now, speak. You have my permission to say whatever you want. What I would give for you to complete a single sentence without stuttering like an imbecile!” “P-P-Please-” Maxi desperately tried to loosen her rigid tongue through her chattering teeth. She unwittingly bit it in the process, and blood trickled down her mouth. Pure contempt flashed in her father’s eyes as he glared down at her. He shoved her away and strode over to the wall to select a riding crop. Maxi watched helplessly as he took one down. Although there was nothing restraining her, Maxi found that she could not move. “Turn around and undress,” the duke commanded coldly. Maxi did not respond. “The lashing you’ll receive will only worsen the longer you delay.” Maxi took off her robe with trembling hands and pulled her bodice down. The duke took his place behind her, facing her bare back. Maxi bit down on the front of her dress that she clutched over her chest. The cruel lashing soon began. The leather crop sliced into her skin like a knife. Every blow made her feel like a wretched beast, and every time the pain of a hacking ax landed on her back, she wanted to abandon all her pride and beg for forgiveness. Although she tried to endure it on her knees, she soon curled into a ball on the cold stone floor and instinctively tried to crawl away. Her father’s furious bellows reverberated around her, but Maxi could not comprehend any of it. Cowering with her arms over her head, she burst into sobs. The lashings abruptly stopped. It did not occur to Maxi to look up as she whimpered in pain while struggling to breathe. An icy voice pierced the room. “What in the devil are you doing?” Maxi’s neck stiffened before she slowly looked up. Riftan had one hand clamped around the duke’s wrist, his face full of incomprehension as he took in the sight before him.